I want to tell you about 2 miracles. The first is that I'm an inch farther away from the failure line. I'm not where I want to be, (let's face it, all A's), but at this point, I felt it was safe to buy books for the next semester. I have a test today, one tomorrow, and another on Thursday, so hopefully I'll still feel safe by Friday morning!
The second miracle is what I've been learning about fetal development. If it isn't proof of a creator and intentional design, I don't know what it. Have you ever thought about how babies breathe in the uterus? Did you know their heart is beating when they are 8-weeks old? They are less than an inch long, but their heart is circulating blood. Did you know that a baby's heart works, in some ways, the opposite in the womb, and then when we are born, 3 shunts fuse shut so we can breathe with our lungs and circulate blood differently? If any of you are actually interested in learning more, take a look at this video I've been watching on repeat, trying desperately to memorize for my test this afternoon.
Thanks for all your prayers, support, and encouragement. Only 11 months until graduation!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9O-i6k0mGrU&index=22&list=PLvA06TlF72GPG1WVxD3s-_qrqo7m0z5h_
p.s. Did you know pregnant women can get scurvy? I thought only pirates got that! (it's basically bleeding gums and other yucky things in your mouth due to the excretion of hormones and extra saliva during pregnancy)
Monday, January 29, 2018
Wednesday, January 10, 2018
A Dark Hour
When I completed my first semester of nursing school, I was exhausted but in a pretty good place overall. I finished well academically and felt confident in my ability to succeed as long as I took care of myself and stayed on track.
Then I got the lowest grade I've gotten so far in the program on my first test of the semester. Then I did even worse on my second test last night. It's a 5-week intensive course, so there isn't much time to bring up my grade. I'm frazzled, to say the least. My school doesn't allow extra credit projects, and if you get below an 80% in any class, you're out of the program. I'm way too close to that line right now.
I have some chronic medical issues most people don't know about, and I don't want to get into right now, but it's enough to know they are having an impact on my overall anxiety level and general wellness right now. I'm trying to study at least 5-7 hours a day on top of 5-6 hours of class, but it's just not enough to learn everything. Some of you may know I have learning disabilities, so it takes me longer than the average joe to learn new material. My health issues have surfaced lately and have slowed me down. I know I need to rest so my chronic issues don't get worse, but studying less creates a great deal of anxiety because I have very little cushion in my grade right now. I feel like I'm between a rock and a hard place. So, pray for wisdom and the courage to actually rest and take the time my body needs.
I know I need to be willing to walk through my fear of failure. I've always put way too much stock in my grades, and this has been a great opportunity to grow through being humbled! It's embarrassing to even admit I'm struggling, but I'm hoping this will be therapeutic. I want to be so content with who I am in Christ that I can fail out of nursing school and not waiver in that identity. Of course, I don't want to fail, and I certainly don't plan on it, but I need to be willing to celebrate God's will no matter what. He alone knows what's best for me.
Your prayers and encouraging notes mean a lot. Most of the time I love living alone, but sometimes it can get lonely, and even a simple comment on facebook means a lot! You get bonus friend points if you can make me laugh. I want to say a special "thank you" to my awesome family who has been incredibly supportive. Let's hope my next update is much more cheerful!
Then I got the lowest grade I've gotten so far in the program on my first test of the semester. Then I did even worse on my second test last night. It's a 5-week intensive course, so there isn't much time to bring up my grade. I'm frazzled, to say the least. My school doesn't allow extra credit projects, and if you get below an 80% in any class, you're out of the program. I'm way too close to that line right now.
I have some chronic medical issues most people don't know about, and I don't want to get into right now, but it's enough to know they are having an impact on my overall anxiety level and general wellness right now. I'm trying to study at least 5-7 hours a day on top of 5-6 hours of class, but it's just not enough to learn everything. Some of you may know I have learning disabilities, so it takes me longer than the average joe to learn new material. My health issues have surfaced lately and have slowed me down. I know I need to rest so my chronic issues don't get worse, but studying less creates a great deal of anxiety because I have very little cushion in my grade right now. I feel like I'm between a rock and a hard place. So, pray for wisdom and the courage to actually rest and take the time my body needs.
I know I need to be willing to walk through my fear of failure. I've always put way too much stock in my grades, and this has been a great opportunity to grow through being humbled! It's embarrassing to even admit I'm struggling, but I'm hoping this will be therapeutic. I want to be so content with who I am in Christ that I can fail out of nursing school and not waiver in that identity. Of course, I don't want to fail, and I certainly don't plan on it, but I need to be willing to celebrate God's will no matter what. He alone knows what's best for me.
Your prayers and encouraging notes mean a lot. Most of the time I love living alone, but sometimes it can get lonely, and even a simple comment on facebook means a lot! You get bonus friend points if you can make me laugh. I want to say a special "thank you" to my awesome family who has been incredibly supportive. Let's hope my next update is much more cheerful!
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