Procrastination and an attempt at humor

A girl can't study 24 hours a day, so I came up with this list of things nursing students never say:

White scrubs are such a perfect color for this job.

I’ve gone to the bathroom 6 times already during this shift.

I wish the nursing homes would turn up the heat. It's freezing in here! (For reals, one room was set on 90 degrees!!!)

I was so bored this weekend I binged Gilmore Girls for, like, the 5th time.

I ate an amazing steak from the cafeteria during my hour-long lunch break today.

I can’t wait to write care plans after I graduate.

I’m totally confident about passing my boards.

Those test questions were so clear and straight from the powerpoint slides, but I wish there had been more "select all that apply" questions.

I wrote that paper the night we got the syllabus.

I’ve lost so much weight this semester.

Inserting my first foley cath was such a peaceful experience.

My hands feel so moisturized after clinicals today.

I slept, like, at least 11 hours last night.

I’ve been on so many dates this year.

My feet, neck, and back feel amazing.

Scrubs are so flattering.

I’m not tired of wearing my hair in a bun.

I don’t miss wearing nail polish, jewelry, or shoes that aren't all-white leather.

I’m going to be five minutes late to clinicals.

I studied too much for this test.

I wish my professors would talk about the importance of washing my hands.

You want me to put this where??